NOTAM

NOTAMs, or Notices to Airmen, are those important advisories that pilots check each day before flying to ensure safe flight. Important little things like “do not fly in area so and so because the military are holding live fire exercises there”, or “Taxiway 06 is under repair so beware of the large orange dump trucks.” Our son, the fighter pilot, used to send us little Notices to Parents to let us know what a good and careful pilot he was so we wouldn’t worry about the oftentimes bizarre antics of fighter pilots.

When he was flying the CF-5, an aircraft that apparently liked to stop flying some days just around landing speed, he sent a NOTPAR saying he would “Add 10 knots for Pops”, meaning he brought it to the button at 190 instead of 180. Pilots have little credos that he would send along as NOTPARs just to keep us in the loop. “There is nothing more useless than runway behind you or air above you”; “There is no reason to fly into a thunderstorm in peacetime”; “There is no such thing as too much fuel on an airplane unless it’s on fire”, “Don’t jump out of a perfectly good airplane.” I suppose it was a result of his younger days when we left NOTSONs (Notices to Son) on the refrigerator.

NOTSON: “take out the garbage this morning”; “tidy up your room, Grandma is coming”; “money on table for your lunch today”; “when is that parent-teacher interview?” or “clean that stinking cat box!!!”

Nowadays, I need those little notes to myself so I won’t forget important things like “pick up milk and bread” or “get a haircut”. My car sends me little notes on its yellow message centre that says “fuel low” or “washer fluid low” or “time for oil change”. Whatever would we do without all these little prompts?

Signs along the highways and byways prompt us to take the next exit if we want something depicted by symbols, like a knife and fork for food, or a Boy Scout tent symbol that says we can pitch a tent somewhere in the next 2 kilometres or purchase gasoline to put out that little yellow note on the dash. Circles with slashes through them on doors warn us that we can not do anything from smoking, drinking or farting behind those doors.

Advertisers are now issuing NOTCOMs (Notices to Consumer). Spray cans carry notices to consumers that indicate that these cans may explode, contain poison, corrosives that will blind you and should not be sprayed on your own cats or dogs. Do not freeze or keep in the sun or the product may not perform as the manufacturer warrants in their advertisements. TV ads for medical products now carry so many NOTCOMs of the possible side affects that a person would have to be a death’s door to risk using most of them. They should have, however, warned us about the need to sing off-key in the shower after using their ED product. Oddly, I’ve tried that new Mach X razor and no sweet young lass has appeared to stroke my silky smooth cheek, offering to take me lunch or whatever.

At City Council meetings we get NOTPUBs, little Notices to the Public on acceptable behaviour: the time we are allowed to speak without being flagged; the number of times we may speak on a subject; and so forth, all in the interest of decorum and expediency. We get friendly little NOTPUBs from the Treasurer saying that we must pay our tax bill despite the fact that it is too high, or that double inflation is a necessity on our flat-rate water bill regardless of our valiant efforts at conserving water by not washing our driveway.

Perhaps we ought to develop a system of NOTPOLs, Notices to Politicians. How handy would it have been to issue a NOTPOL to Harris warning him not to keep his promises, or to Dalton to keep his promises? Could we have sent one to our MPP about getting the hospital underway? Something like “Funding disappearing due to inflation – make up your minds” or “whither goeth Hwy 11 funding?” Could we send a NOTPOL to our MP about the water filtration plant funding? Unlike NOTAMs to the pilots that are heeded, is there any chance that a NOTPOL would be?

NOTPOLs on the race track, with slots (maybe), pesticides, selling Public Property, etc. are made by individuals all the time. Often politicians will listen to the pros and cons and then make up their minds using their own best judgement for the public good, not their own good. At least that is what they are supposed to do. Every once in a while some of them get caught with their (or their friend’s) fingers in the cookie jar, but fortunately that doesn’t seem to happen much on the local level, this behaviour being reserved for the senior government where more money is at stake.

Perhaps some of the best NOTPOL devices are editorials and letters to the editor, or in the case of Baytoday, the News Comments forum. Politicians do seek advice and public support on their ideas and stances on topics, especially if they are going to seek re-election. While verbal comments or NOTPOLs can be ‘forgotten’, but once they are printed in ink or electronically there is a permanency that can not be easily ignored. This of course applies to poor NOTPOLs as well as good ones, so thought should be applied before issuing any notices.

One of the NOTPOLs that caught my attention recently was the one that tried to put a finer point on vacant lands known as ‘City Property’. The inference being that ‘City Property’ seemed to belong to the Mayor and Council, while ‘Public Property’ belonged to the citizens of North Bay. What the Council sees as a vacant property that does not bring in tax revenue, the Public sees as green space or parklands, that while vacant, are not always unused and are a part of what makes North Bay unique.

While in-filling and lane closures are commendable in most cases, perhaps we need a NOTPOL about not turning North Bay into North Barrie. The big box stores that seem to have cornered council’s attention lately will come when our market population warrants it, and not before. But there is more to life than shopping. We should keep our focus on our unique lifestyle in North Bay. NOTPOL: “No short-term gain for long-term pain.”