Colleen Ouellette had a special way of saying goodbye to her children over the telephone. Ouellette, of Irish ancestry, would ask them each to put their right hand on their left shoulder and their left hand on their right shoulder.
Colleen Ouellette had a special way of saying goodbye to her children over the telephone.
Ouellette, of Irish ancestry, would ask them each to put their right hand on their left shoulder and their left hand on their right shoulder.
“Then I’d tell them to squeeze their shoulders and I’d say ‘you’re getting a big Irish squeeze from your mom,’” Ouellette told BayToday.ca Sunday.
“I can’t do that anymore. I can't show them my love anymore.”
Baby stepsOuellette’s former husband Gerry and their children Kevin, 9, Stephen, 13, Tracey, 16, and Scott, 17, were all killed in a collision with a transport truck Nov. 30 on Hwy 11, north of South River.
Now, just over a month and a half later, Ouellette says she’s trying to rebuild her life taking “baby” steps.
“I can only take it one day at a time, that’s all I can do,” said Ouellette, who has set up the Ouellette Family Memorial Fund through the Nipissing-Parry Sound Catholic District School Board.
“They were my only children and I can’t have anymore. But the support I’ve been getting from my friends and relatives has meant everything.”
Sole survivorOuellette said she’d seen her children an hour before they had died, having dropped them off in Gravenhurst for Gerry to pick up.
“I’m the sole survivor of that actual family unit,” said Ouellette from her Toronto home.
“We were six, and now we’re just one.”
Memories everywhereNow engaged to a Toronto police officer, Ouellette said memories of her children are everywhere.
“My son’s slippers are still sitting in the same spot he left them whenever he came to visit. I haven’t been able to move them,” Ouellette said.
She had purchased a home prior to the accident “with lots of space for my children when they came to see me.”
“This is where the memories are with the children.”
Ouellette shares one memory in particular, when Tracey gave her a book called Dear Mom on her birthday three months ago.
“Her inscription was ‘Dear Mom. When I first read this book it touched me so much because everything in it is so true. I hope you enjoy this book. I love you so much, and thank you for everything. You mean everything to me. Love, your only daughter forever, Tracey Ouellette.’ She had the soul of a poet,” Ouellette said, her voice trembling with emotion.
Permanent tributeAnd while she’ll always have Tracey, Stephen, Kevin and Scott in her heart, Ouellette decided she wanted them on her skin too as a permanent tribute.
After the children’s’ funeral in North Bay, Ouellette went to the Thirteen 12 Tattoo parlour, on Airport Road, and had a
four-leaf clover tattooed on her shoulder.
The letters S, S, K, and T are on the clover, one on each leaf.
Heart-wrenching experienceTattoo artist James Sroga, whose folks are Kevin’s Godparents, designed and performed the tattoo work.
“I think it was a wonderful way to remember the children,” Sroga said, “but it was also a very heart-wrenching experience for me doing the tattoo for her.”
But Ouellette said the tattoo lets her once again do something she loves doing.
“Now I can give my children that same big Irish hug, because I know they’re with me all the time, right here on my shoulder.”
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PHOTO Colleen Ouellette lost her four children and former husband in a car accident Nov. 30 on Hwy 11 N, north of South River.
