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Where's the Pea?

Do you remember that old shell game, the one with the three walnut shells and a pea? A master of prestidigitation would show you a pea under one shell and then switch the shells around in a confusing manner, then he would ask you to guess (and bet) u

Do you remember that old shell game, the one with the three walnut shells and a pea? A master of prestidigitation would show you a pea under one shell and then switch the shells around in a confusing manner, then he would ask you to guess (and bet) under which shell the pea resided. The odds might seem to have been one-in-three but the bettor hardly ever won.

Now imagine if you will three walnut shells at City Hall. Let’s call them the Operating Budget, the Capital Budget and the Reserve Fund. Normally the shell games goes like this: the Operating Shell starts each fiscal year with a sum of money and by the end of the year, that money should be used up and the shell empty. So if you were betting where the pea was at the end of the year you would not guess it was under the Operating shell, although sometimes there is a small piece of the pea left or even a negative pea. In that case a special pea must be found, by a levy, to keep that shell in the game for the next game (year).

Under the Capital shell, the image of the pea can change in size over the years but it should be consumed or committed within a certain period. Chances are if you guessed the pea was under that shell, you might be correct. So although the magicians shuffle the pea around under the shell, it does not escape, although it may be deferred or reallocated – but not to the other shells unless there is a real emergency.

The pea(s) under the Reserve shell are put there for special reasons, by law. They are nurtured over the years to meet a planned, specific need, like buying a new fire truck or replacing a piece of infrastructure that the magicians know is deteriorating. They might even have a pea called a ‘rainy day’ pea although there are restrictions on how big that pea can be since the magicians are not allowed to over-tax their serfs in the city. You should always guess that there is a pea under the Reserve shell.

Finding the pea under one of the three shells, say for a sudden washed out road or heavy snow falls may take a little lifting of the shells and peeking to see where the pea money is. A quick shuffle of the fingers and the pea can be moved with hardly anyone noticing.

Now just to complicate things, let’s add another walnut shell and call this one ‘Hydro’ for instance. Under this shell there are more smaller shells. Some of these hazelnut shells have peas, some even a large pea, in fact one so big they can give some of it to one of the three walnut shells at City Hall. Now before you guess where the real pea is when we shuffle these four walnut shells, let’s use some inside information that will help you as the fingers move the shells around and around. One shell does not have say 5 million dollars so it borrows it from someone outside the game, promising to pay it back from another shell sometime in the future. Then we transfer some monies we have stored somewhere else, maybe with Peter, and give it to Paul whose walnut shell called Operating has somehow lost its pea. Then someone from the fourth shell wants some money, say about 5 million for fifteen years, but instead of using one of its own hazelnut shells, goes to a different shell and borrows that money from a walnut shell that no one thought had the hidden pea.

Confused yet? Has the magician manipulated the shells so deftly that you have no idea of where the pea is, in fact you are not even sure if there is a pea? You see, in the old shell game, the prestidigitator never did have the pea under one of the walnut shells: it was hidden in his hand until the bettor guessed a shell. Then he or she quickly, and faster than the eye could catch, put the pea under another shell.

What a great, entertaining game, except that they are playing with our pea. Perhaps someday, when they tire of playing with us, they will tell us where all the peas are.





Bill Walton

About the Author: Bill Walton

Retired from City of North Bay in 2000. Writer, poet, columnist
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