Thinking about my shrinking retirement funds
I thought I ought to dust off my résumé
to be ready for one of those million jobs
the Conservatives are promising after June
Employers are not supposed to discriminate
on age, sex and religion but I thought I should
be upfront and tell all
I’m old enough to remember the end
of World War II and every war since then
I watched Armstrong walk on the moon
saw Challenger explode Columbia disintegrate
Kennedy assassinated and Oswald murdered
as well as
Pierre Elliot Trudeau giving us the finger
I truly did walk 2 miles to public school
winter spring and fall uphill all the way
learned my letters and numbers in a
two-room schoolhouse
got the leather strap for talking
in grade three
and have been quiet ever since
I’ve played hockey fastball golf
touch football ping pong and volleyball
I boxed a few rounds and been
wrestled unceremoniously to the ground
lost at chess and checkers
called Euchre and bid six spades
and curled rocks down the ice
yelling hurry hurry
or something like that
I have fired a rifle, a pistol and shotgun
at critters, targets and dinner
gathered eggs, killed and dressed chickens
milked a one-eyed cow by hand
rode a horse or two
cleaned a stable, coiled hay
cut trees into logs, pulp and firewood
I pulled weeds and picked strawberries
planted potatoes and cabbage
made soups from same
cooked cakes, cookies and rib-eye steaks
painted Easter eggs
and cut and decorated Christmas trees
even played Santa Claus
I’ve been elected to a township council
chaired boards and committees
preached a church sermon
before I saw the light
sang some Gilbert and Sullivan songs
play-acted on the stage
and danced until the wee hours
at the Officer’s Mess
I have flown in gliders, propeller planes
military jets and passenger planes
stood on the Acropolis overlooking Athens
and in St Peter’s square sans a pope
walked through the Arc de Triomphe
seen operas, ballets and plays at Stratford
fought a forest fire and
patrolled in a police car
I sipped red wine with strangers on the banks
of the Rhone drank bubbly on the South River
sipped good whiskey with my friends
and sampled home brews behind the barn
smoked a real cigar in Cuba
I have slept in the forest under canvas
been lost in the northern bush twice
and in New York City once
I have walked in the steamy jungle
waded through waist-deep snow at minus 40
swam with the coral fishes in the
clear Caribbean and calm Pacific
howled at night wolves talked to foxes
photographed hundreds of birds
and caught a few fish
I had my belly cut open
my knee and hip replaced
all my teeth pulled at sixteen
and still have a dormant kidney stone
I’ve ridden a motorcycle the distance of
five times around the world
drove a school bus full of yelling kids
raced go-carts
and made love in a canoe
I worked in a sawmill
run on logs and piled slabs
worked on the railroad and have dug a ditch
I’ve been down in a dark damp silver mine
audited tax books counted inventory
been hired and fired
wrote computer software, some news columns
a few books, stories and poetry
and dreamed of many wonderful things
I’ve been married to the same woman for
more than fifty years held my newborn son
and laid my parents in the cold dark ground
seen kings and queens, clowns and crooks
broke bread with Margaret A
flown with the Snowbirds and
toasted the Royal Horse Artillery
in Kingston
and I’m not done yet
What do you want me to do?
